you see. i'm in delimma right now. i think i want to pour everything in here, in this blog. well, you can skip reading this if you want. this is the most sad-est moment i've been through out of my life (so far). here it goes.. on the 24th of august, we lost a father, father-in-law and a grandfather to my family forever. it was very sudden. only my family have no opportunity to see arwah nini for the last time. we were told less than hour before of his death. plus, with the phone-trouble we have which is totally not our fault. we were very sad because of not informed. we are also the family who love him. but people said blood is thicker than water, thing is, i didn't believe my ears when all the rumors saying that we're not coming because of our own carelessness. but seriouslyy, we were NOT INFORMED EARLIER! and it was entirelyy who's fault? (but we never blame others) because it was none of people's fault. and yet one person just want to see us more sad. that person brought things up and put a blame on me (specifically!) i don't know why i was stabbed. he said he heard the rumours of me being so 'sayang credit' and not answering phone. but i was dozzed off and my phone's battery was charged. still, we were informed late! and we never complaint it until he brought this things up.
my parents just want us to keep a hush. we don't want to worsen things. we just pray to god so my grandfather can rest in peace. i missed him already. he was a good grandfather. eventhough he didn't really showed to us (me and my siblings) but deep inside we knew he always love us. the way he he said to us, the way he looked at us and everything he did, i knew he loves us. we felt his lost. his facial expression and his voice always played in my mind lately. and it makes me feel sad. the last time i met him was on 'makan-makan' at his house, it was a week before he went. he was joking with me; when i just arrived there, one of my uncles asked me to give something to the kitchen. so my hand was full, i went straight to the kitchen to deliver the thing and after that i went immediately ti nini and 'salam' nini's hand. he jokingly said that,"inda ko tekilala kan aku ka wang tarus ke dapur" and he smiled, i knew he was just joking. but when i think of it again i feel very sad, i miss him so much. this is the last pictures of him that i took.
arwah nini and aina.
i wish i was in the picture as well.
lucky aini, she has no idea it was a last picture of her with arwah nini.
i feel jealous of aini and aina. when i see the pictures again i don't know why i miss nini so much. lots of time when i think of him my tears drop. i really miss him. nini, we all love you and you know that. he was a good father, a good father-in-law and a good grandfather to us. we always love you and we pray to god may god bless you. we love youu nini... al-fatihah to my nini Hj Mohammad bin Hj besar.
p/s: in memory of him, i hope my readers can recite him with al-fatihah. thank you readers.
